Burn, baby burn

Posted on

I won’t lie the person in that photo is me. To be fair it was a few years ago, when I was much younger and far less sensible. Obviously I would never get so badly burned now. And that burn was particularly bad as it was only down my front side. The backs of my legs were white as a sheet. Bad. Times. I remember wandering around the shop and a fellow shopper pointing out my legs to a friend and her friend actually let out an audible ‘ohhh’. I guess that’s how a caged animal must feel. Anyway, after such a bad burn I vowed to never again be caught in the position of looking like an overcooked bit of salmon. It’s only fair that I share this knowledge with you. Are you reading closely? You really don’t want to miss this…

WEAR SUNCREAM. It really is that simple. And none of this ‘oh oil still counts as sun cream’ chat. It doesn’t. It will literally fry you in the sun. Fried, is that the look you’re going for.

To be fair you all seem a lot more sensible than me. @dorkymum, @thehankerer and @margotbarbara all slap on factor 50 and @paulieful uses 40. This seems a little extreme to me, I mean I do want to come home looking like I’ve been on holiday. @gillianetc and @original_em use a more sun-tan friendly 20 – I’m with you girls! The real  risk takers seem to be @glasgow_food and @sebsmummy who go free of the cream. Take a look at that photo girls? It’s not a pretty sight.

If you’re living life on edge like @glasgow_food, @sebsmum and @paulieful’s mum then here are some top tips for dealing with the burns you will inevitably get. I’m not judging girls, unfortunately these tips have all been tried by me in moments of extreme pain…

Mabel’s Top Tips for Sunburn

1. Aloe. See the green stuff in the side of this picture? It’s aloe vera. You can get it at most supermarkets in sunny locations. Make sure you get the one that’s 100% aloe vera. Apply it liberally. Otherwise you can go foraging for some leaves. I’d probably stick with the stuff in the bottle.
2. Vinegar. Vinegar is pretty  much the miracle cure for just about everything, burns included. You can either put a little on a wash cloth to make a cold compress or add a bottle-ful to a bath and soak in it for a whole. It’s almost instant relief from the itchiness and soreness. You’ll never want to leave that bath.
3. Water. Sunburned skin looses the ability to retain water so best to drink, drink, drink LOTS of water to keep yourself hydrated (and running to the toilet). On the plus side this’ll probably to wonders for your complextion. Every cloud…
4. Cucumber. You’d need a lot of cucumber to cover your entire body if you put a slice of cucumber on areas that are especially sore this should cool the problem area. I’d suggest probably not eating it afterwards.
5. Tea. Make it green. Make a pot of green tea and let it cool before soaking a wash cloth in it to make a compress. Green tea contains properties that will protect your skin from future damage and reduce the inflammation. Result.

Well there you go folks. You’ve been well warned. Always best to whap on a high factor and work your way down. There really is nothing worse than scorching yourself on day one and then having to sit inside for the rest of the holiday. However, if you’ve got a good story/picture of yourself being burned for goodness sake tweet them to @mabelslog and I will retweet all the best ones. Get. Involved.